Traumatic ExperiencesTraumas occur when mental stress or physical injury result in more than momentary fear. Children feel helpless and not prepared to cope with events. The result is residual fear that may become more intense and last for some period of time. There are many situations that can trigger off this type of fear. Some are obvious and well known while others are relatively subtle. For example, being bitten or menaced by an animal may cause specific fear of that animal, fear of all animals, or even a heightened fearful approach to any situation. How far a fear broadens from the original feared object is called generalization. Fear often generalize in children to whole categories. In young children, a traumatic experience with a sheepdog could lead to a fear of all dogs, all animals, or all wooly or furry objects. Other potentially traumatic experiences are hospitalizations, operations, fire, water, thunder, crashes, falling, etc. bathing can be scary in terms of slipping into the water or stinging soap getting in their eyes.
More subtle traumas are the constant bombardment of bad news and disastrous events that are depicted in media. Even if your own town is safe and friendly, murders, robberies, and physical injuries of all kinds are shown on news stories. Children may develop a view of the world as a mean, scary place! Television, movies, and comic books frequently contain violence watchers has been amply documented. For example, television viewers between 7 and 11 years of age are scared more frequently than children not viewing the programs usually seen by that age group.
Projected Anger
A typical reaction of childhood is to become angry at maltreatment, feel rage, and wish to harm the adults. The wish is a taboo or unacceptable feeling which then is projected onto adults. "I hate you and want to hurt you-(unacceptable)-you hate me and will hurt or kill me." This pattern is especially strong between the ages of 2 and 6 years. Similarly, impulses to engage in any kind of unacceptable behavior may lead to guilt and fear or punishment. Children have all kinds of aggressive, sexual, or strange thoughts and fantasies that can scare them directly or lead to projection. Fear of punishment gets projected onto people being furious at them or fantasies of being punished by monsters, criminals, or supernatural beings. Projecting anger is normal, but intense or prolonged projection is not. Some children and teenagers have not learned to accept or handle their own anger.
Control Others
Fears may become a means of influencing or manipulating others. At times, being fearful may be the only (or very powerful) means of getting attention. This pattern directly reinforces the child for having fears. It becomes more gratifying to be frightened, and the feelings may be intensified. The problem is that fear then becomes both very rewarding yet painful at the same time. It is particularly strong when fear is the only, or main, way for children to influence or control their parents. The struggle by parents to calm the child becomes a pattern, with parents experiencing failure in accomplishing their goal. One outstanding example is a school phobia. Children show extreme fear of going to school, and the result is that parents allow them to stay home. Children get their wish of avoiding school and remaining home. This strengthened if the parent is ambivalent about sending the child to school or inadvertently makes staying home a fun or rewarding experience. The net result of these types of situations is that fear becomes a means of influencing others. As with other childhood problems, the original reason for the fear developing may lose its effectiveness, but the fear has become a habit.
Constitutionally Highly Reactive
parents frequently describe some children as always having been overly sensitive, high strung, timid, or fearful. They describe a pattern almost from birth or during the first or second year of over reactivity. These children react very strongly to sound, sudden motion, changes in the environment, etc. The implication is clear. These children's central nervous systems appear to be constitutionally more sensitive than others. it takes less to set them off, and they often take alonger time to recover their equilibrium. The cause is some combination of heredity, conditions during pregnancy, and delivery. In popular terms, these children seem to be built that way. The child who cries wildly at a sudden, moderately loud sound may be more susceptible to developing intense fears. This "high strung" child later appears to over-react to many diverse situations. usual surprises and unfamiliar people and situations may not at all phase a more placid child. The overly sensitive child may easily develop fears, which quickly generalize to other situations.
At 4 or 5 years, imagination becomes well developed. These children are very prone to imagining all kinds of frightening events. When the intensity or duration of fears dramatically increases, the fears are called phobias. Phobias can strongly influence children's lives, often interfering with everyday functioning. One example is the fear of falling asleep. These overly sensitive children may imagine that they won't wake up or that they're completely helpless. Anything might happen to them or some unimaginably horrible dream may occur.
Psychologically or Physically Weakened
When children are fatigued or sick, they are often more prone to developing fears. This is especially true if the physically weakened state is prolonged. Malnourishment and low blood sugar are not rare. The state of debilitation leads to a helpless vulnerable feeling. The usual psychilogically protective mechanisms are not adequately functioning. Similarly, if a child's self-esteem is generally low, she is more susceptible to fear develipment. She feels sad, isolated, helpless, and less able to cope with scary thoughts and feelings. Overly permissive parents contribute to this pattern by not fostering feelings of competency in meeting demands and limits. Children with low self-esteem or who are weakened physically feel unable to cope with real or imagined danger.
Reaction to Family Atmosphere
Criticism and scolding. Excessive criticism may well lead to children becoming fearful. Children feel that they can do nothing right and anticipate negative reactions. They appear to expect criticism and frequently look timid and cringing. Frequent threat of negative evaluation can have the same effect. A specific example is the child who is scolded for getting dirty. Fear of dirt is an obvious result, but a more general fear of being messy or disorganized may occur. The form of a fear depends upon the area of frequent criticism. Children who are criticized for being too active or intrusive may become timid and shy.
Strict and overly demanding. An atmosphere of excessive strictness can produce generally fearful children or children especially fearful of authority. These kids may be terrified by teachers or policeman, who represent authority. Overly demanding parents often do not understand that there are fears expected at different ages. They have little tolerance for the temporary fears that children exhibit. By not accepting these occurrences and by expecting "smooth sailing," they criticize their children for being normal. Parental over-expectations are powerful causes of fear of failure in children. Similarly, perfectionistic parents often have fearful children, who cannot meet parental demands and become afraid to try.
Family conlicts. Intense or prolonged battles between parents, between siblings, of between parents and children create tense atmospheres. Continuous heated arguments promote feelings of insecurity. Insecure children feel less able to handle usual childhood fears. Even discussion of everyday financial and social problems may frighten children. Sensitive children often feel burdened by family problems which they cannot understand or misinterpret as being hopeless situations. There feelings are magnified if parents are perceived as incapable of dealing with problems.
Fears modered. Witnessing fears in adults, siblings, or peeps is very influential. Children learn to be afraid by imitation. It is very usual for very fearful children to have at least one fearful parent. Fears are accepted a natural way of life. Demonstrating or frequently discussing fears can have a similar effect. A mother who is frightened of insects and heights may have a similarly frightened child. However, because fear generalizes it is possible that a child could develop a fear of almost anything. parents who are afraid of not being able to cope with everyday stress promote a generally fearful view of the world in a child. It should be kept in mind that some children aremore susceptible than others due to their general temperament. It is very usual for one child of timid parents to be extremely fearful while other siblings may not be at all fearful.
Relevant Topic:
- Behavior Problems of Children
- Immature Behaviors
- Insecure Behaviors
- Habit Disorders
- Peer Problems
- Antisocial Behaviors
- Other Problems
